Near death experience
A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live.
Upon her recovery she decides to stay in the hospital and have major cosmetic surgery: a face lift, liposuction, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair colour. She figures, since she's got another 30 or 40 years, she might as well make the most of it.
After the last operation she walks out the hospital looking like a new woman and is killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrives in front of God and asks, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years?"
God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."