Alice

A woman was pushing a pram which contained a screaming, bellowing baby.

The woman kept repeating softly,
"Don't get excited, Alice; don't scream, Alice; don't yell, Alice; keep calm, Alice."

A woman standing nearby said,
"You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe little Alice."

The woman looked at her and said,
"Lady, I'm Alice!"

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